.. give it to me now lol.. haa

i need a shorts set.. STOP THE PRESS!

im getting married.. right now

thanks teddy.. u jus made me wanna get wifed.

..music take me away

As influential as the life I have chosen, the life I have inherited..my
senses tell me to write when she plays...her wordplay so sincere,
approach to my eardrums and spoken word to my mind tears away at my
psyche..I'm so engulfed in her ups and downs, her upper tier attitude,
her flow of evanescence..simple and complex, loving and careful..careful
to not lead my heart astray but to steer my thoughts into her...

each scat, each pitch, each sincere word and flow she presents to me
leads me to believe she sings to me..leads me to believe she speaks to
me..leads me to believe she sees me..lettin me kno there's no beter,
that confidence takes me ona whirlwind..nicknames and head rubs, not
only physically but deep within the rooted stems of my brain..so intense
is my forseen future with her by my side I can repeat the many words
that pull me further and further in..I like this feeling, only time I've
felt I have fallen..

for a complete stranger, only seen within feet of dialouge, never
completley speaking but always talking, telepathically from miles and
miles apaprt..see has to see me when she writes these so called
confessions..desire to be endulged in me..I welcome it with open arms,
smiling faces, nurturing touches, and steady paces

shit..all I have to do is press rewind to be put in this whirlwind of
emotion to feel the existence of she next to me without even touching
her presence..a breath taken in music is a step taken in life, a
profession of love to the world and influence to my existence that I can
ultimatley one day take her on that joyous ride as she has taken me.

so the need to be out and about has started to run its course with me
I'm noticing..the actual desire to be seen is getting old and this time,
its taking a wild form..that form that pushes it to the backburner and
relinquishes it from ya everyday schedule..no longer do I really feel
the need to do it bigger and better..in sac, doin it bigger and better
can only go so big...only so many bottles can be popped, only so many
vip rooms can be filled, and only so many spots out here have enough
diversity that u feel like your improving in your approach..I'm
tired.mentally, of how the course is takin me...I'm beginning to relish
in the night of nothing, long days of work and weekends of tasks to be
fulfileld and relaxation to be had..yes, I still on occasion long for
the rush of excitment that happens when ya step in the spot and everyone
says hi, the hugs and handshakes, cheek kisses and eye contact..yea its
fun..its great, makes me feel the love.

but its getting old..

and its going nowhere fast..I realized last week that I'm tired and
shouldn't be, I'm 24..and vibrant..I eat vitamins and work out
occasionally..my winds should come often and numerous..lol..tired
mentally definitley..its gettin old..now I'm not sayin ima stop doin it
big from time to time, but the horizon has definitley got to be
broadened...the avenues have got to be open..the lanes need to be
wider..my vision was blury for some time, but now I can see a lil
clearer..(drops some cleareyes* into ma eyes)...gotta get MY focus back
and start to worry bout my growth..caught in the rapture of fun fun fun
with no reprieve doesn't help much..now these options I choose will def
be more beneficial for I.

its hard to get othas on the bandwagon if they don't fully feel ya
vision nor have the same motivation u do..

hmph..time will tell.
-------------------------------------------------------

.nice.

baby youuu got me open, baby I jus wanna make ya mine..by the end o da
niiiiite.. :D

bobby valentinos new album goes to work.

with the inclusion of my best friend gettin saved this past sunday (a
blessing in itself) and ma boy gettin married, at 24, I had an
interesting weekend. to see your "brother", confidant and overall ace
take a big step like that it means a lot...accepting christ is a big
thing, for someone like myself who aint the most spiritual type, church
goin person, but knows who I am and where I'm going, and that its
nowhere witout HIM, it helps to kno that my closest has accepted that
path as well..nicely played my dude!
as for my boy that got married, its funny to see a peer take that huge
step like that. he was happy, gleamin..so I'm happy for him..made me
realize I'm not ready for that just yet, but when that feeling comes,
ill be jus at happy..thas the nex step to the next stage of ya life, and
its a big one..much respect dave, much respect.

my sis graduates the academy this week..congrats sis...she's been thru
hell and back but she made it!..good shit. brotha loves ya.

junes almost over, my bday party was a smash, finished just like I
wanted it to wit me sleep! lol..I'm ready for anotha change...

question of the day: so I wanna learn how to play an insrument..trumpet,
or sax?..

..touchè
-------------------------------------------------------

...hustle till ma heart stop..

letter from teedra :D

See you all the time, when I'm passin by
you neva say a word, u jus smile..
all the silly things others do to impress me,
you take the subtle route,
ths why u caught my eye...

bet you didn't kno I been watchin you,
bet you didn't kno I had eyes for you,
bet you didn't kno that I dream of you,
bet you didn't expect I'd approach and say hi,
but I, see you like everyday..
you be on the block in that swagga way...

been waitin for a second to conversate,
I feel it boy I guess the time is now..

...whassup?

..and every single day, when your eyes meet mine,
I wanna make it clear how I feel inside
I heard around the way who u r and how u rock yo thang,
I try to keep it cool,
when I really wanna roll with you.

bet u didn't kno I been watchin you,
bet you didn't kno I had eyes for you,
bet you didn't know that I dream of you,
bet you didn't expect I'd approach and say hi,
but I, see you like everyday,
you be on the block wit that swagga way

waitin for a second to conversate,
I feel it boy I think the time is now...

..whassup?

I'm feelin you,
ya feelin me,
so baby come with me tonight,
I'm tryna make you see..
jus wat u need is right here in my heart..

do u wana find the way to my heart?

*FAINTS*...

so todays a good day..simple as it may seem, but a good day
nonetheless..brains not occupied wit anything but stackin, chasin them
george washingtons, and finally gettin this hair cut this
weekend..lookin lightweight paul bunyan right now...
the months goin by fast as carl lewis in the 80s, birthdays already 13
days past..man..but I'm feelin good about developments comin along..only
got 340 some odd days till the 25th..340 some odd days till I betta have
ma shit straight...all the way straight.

so I definitley am workin on "claire huxtable"..its comin along
fine..and I will have that for ya soon..indeed.

most intriguing thing on my brain as of late?...a change of
scenery..burning question:...can I move outta sac?..hmmmm...

swagga up!
-------------------------------------------------------

...hustle till ma heart stop..