Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Everything I touch.. turns to gold

I hate when motorcycle drivers try and slither
their way in between people when your sitting in
traffic. One of these days I'm gonna open ma door
and watch mr. motorcycle man go flying. I mean
there's no reason why I should have to veer to the
right a little just cause you wanna slither thru..

You ever feel like your achieving greatness at a
craft that u have repeated for an amount of time
to the point where you don't even feel like you
have to prepare for the next time you do it? To
be honest, I'm like that with interviews.. I have had
2 too many this last year, and it seems that I have
just becomed accustomed to being mr. professional
when I sit down in front of mr. john doe and the
panel of tight asses looking for their next money-
making workhorse.. I flash the pearlies, shake the
hand with authority, and with the ring of the bell
I'm goin for blood. Answerin questions with the
utmost efficiency, making all the eye contact in
the world (not too long for the males).. Using the
old school Bill Clinton hand motions to explain a
"good point"...its all become the norm.. and I leave
the site thinking, "another one bites the dust..."

..until I don't get the job.. LOL. But that hasn't
happened yet this year, so hopefully when that big
bad state gig comes knocking at my door, Ill be
able to put on that same hat.. and SWAG the hell
out them tight asses...


Stew said...

i feel the same way about interviews, even though i have not been interviewed in some time, i just know that i can get a group of people to like me just by talking to them. i feel like i can make almost any group of people laugh, and i am not talking about that "laugh because i know that was a joke but it was not funny" laugh. i mean that "wipe your eyes cuz your crying" laugh.

i got a gift.

12kyle said...

@ Swag
Good post!

I never understood why people would get nervous for an interview. An interview is simply selling yourself. Who knows you betta than you?

RealHustla said...

I used to feel like that, like I didn't have to prepare for interviews. I mean, I was going on like 2 to 3 a week at one point. But then, I took some time to really think about the answers I was giving potential employers. I stopped trying to make my tragic life seem like I planned it that way. I just answered their questions straight up like I had some sense and could do the job I was applying for. Even if I felt I couldn't do some of the things they asked, I let them know. Hey, it worked for me.

By the way, now I'm the interviewer and regardless of whatever position we're interviewing for, everyone on the panel seems to look for the same things, a moderate amount of skills with the ability to learn/grow, and something we call hunger.

Eb the Celeb said...

please dont do that to a biker... I love bikers

and your destined for greatness dear lil blog brutha... apprehension is something you should not have.. just be your charming self


karrie b. said...

@ 12kyle: ppl get nervous for a number of reasons...afraid of public speaking, fear of sounding like an asshole...so on and so forth...

@ swag: any employer would be crazy not to hire you...


Anonymous said...

Make me a promise Swag... when you do decide to clock one of them bikers with your car door... take a pic of them flipping. I'll need that to help defend you in the criminal case that you're gonna catch!


On da real, it's great that your interview skills are on point. I think I'd say the same thing about myself. Granted I've only had 3 jobs in my life, but each one I was hired right away! No hesitation!

The Flyyest said...

ill hire you any day!!!!!!hehehe

LMAO sorry i had to do it!!

Saks Fifth Steph said...

i smiled at "flash the pearlies"

love you.

Darius T. Williams said...

the right one will come around.

I know what you mean though. I was interviewing for a position. The interview process was about 4 months long. I was the finalist againt some girl. It was a Director of Payroll position payint $125K a year - a HUGE step up for a brotha. EVERYTHING went well in all the interviews.

Until I got the e-mail that they decided to go with the other candidate. I'm still a bit mad at that cuz them 4800 every two weeks would have been LOVE!

pink said...

oh shit you had me dying bout the motorcycles!!! lmao...i think i might try that.

funny blog...i came to dap you up on bein a COWBOYS fan!! i saw ur post on 12kyles blog. you know he a hater *looks up at kyle and smirks*

ill be back and uve been blogrolled!

JayBee said...

i feel like i need more time in interviews. usually when they end i'm just getting warmed up. i need to be able to be on my feet and walk around to present my best self. (i stood up in the last one). i just feels so restricted being confined to that chair. i don't think i interview very well, but good enough to get a job.

i.can't.complain. said...

u should host seminars

the swag series:

how to land a gig without even trying

there could be tons of money (and hot chicks) in it for u

not that u care about any of that

u're swag... u don't need any ploy to get babes.

i would wish u luck in your job-search

but it looks like u don't need it



Desy said...

well is there any other way?... lol

you are just too charming for your own good

dejanae said...

im sure u will man

Jaded said...

The job market these days is dreadful. Absolutely dreadful. I'm SO sick of interviews. I do feel like I'm a beast at 'em now though.

12kyle is totally right.

Queen of My Castle said...

I loved that last sentence. Nothing sexier than a man with confidence. Do you babes.